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Silence Fear to Amplify Your Voice and Speak Publicly

Silence Fear to Amplify Your Voice and Speak Publicly

Sonia McPartland was terrified of public speaking. Every time the 46-year-old from Kilkenny was asked to do so, she experienced classic panic symptoms: dry mouth, banged knees and debilitating butterflies in her stomach.

She managed to avoid it during her first career as a service manager in the hospitality industry. “But when I had my daughter, I realized I needed a job with friendlier hours,” she says. “My brother runs a company called JM Safety Training and offered to hire me as an instructor. It was perfect, apart from the fact that I had to speak in front of people. I found the idea horrible.

The nights before her presentation, Sonia I couldn’t sleep. “The thoughts kept spinning through my head,” she says. “My nerves were pounding my stomach and I was constantly on the toilet. I would be overcome by fear.

Public speaking is one of our biggest concerns. A renowned study in the 1970s in the United States found that fear of public speaking was greater than fear of death.

Croatian researchers reaffirmed this conclusion in a study published earlier this year. Of the 536 adults surveyed, 88% cited public speaking as one of their biggest fears, compared to 79% who cited death.

Chartered psychologist Corina Grace explains why speaking in a group intimidates us. “This is related to the anxiety we feel when we make ourselves vulnerable to judgment,” she says. “Some say it goes back to the beginnings of evolution, when our survival depended on not being rejected or excluded by our community. Others argue that it has to do with early childhood experiences, especially if we were harshly reprimanded by adults.

Whatever the cause, glossophobia (the medical term for fear of public speaking) usually manifests itself as a physical response. “This could mean shaking hands, shallow breathing, difficulty thinking, or stomach aches,” says Grace. “In the most extreme cases, this can turn into a full-blown panic attack or cause you to faint. »

Orlaith Carmody is a communications trainer and author of Speak Now, a guide to communicating well in the workplace.

Orlaith Carmody is a communications trainer and author of Speak Now, a guide to communicating well in the workplace.

After seeing hundreds of people prepare to speak publicly, she believes everyone feels this reaction to some extent.

“Anyone who tells you they’re not nervous is lying,” she says. “Even the most experienced speaker in the world feels a shiver of anxiety. The difference is they know how to handle it.

Perhaps we should all rejoice in that. If these people have learned to manage their nerves, surely we can too. Mrs. Grace certainly believes so. “There are people who have limited their career progression because they don’t speak up in meetings, don’t give presentations, and don’t show up for interviews because they have such an aversion to public speaking “, she said. . “But everyone can train to become better public speakers, and everyone gains confidence the more they do it.”

Ms. Carmody compares it to bodybuilding. “Public speaking is a muscle like any other: you take it to the gym and you train it,” she says. “The more you do it, the better you will get.”

Preparation is key

So what lessons should we learn? One is the importance of preparation. The more comfortable you are with the content you provide, the more relaxed you are likely to be.

Preparation should also involve familiarizing yourself with your audience. Knowing who you’ll be speaking to will help you tailor your presentation accordingly, says Carmody.

“A mistake people often make is to focus only on what they have to say and not on interacting with their audience,” she says. “But putting your audience first and explaining why the information you present is important is the way to make it meaningful and interesting.”

Ms. Grace recommends paying attention to your inner voice in preparation mode. “We often sabotage ourselves by telling ourselves that we are going to make a mistake,” she says. “We should instead try to capture and interrogate this inner discourse. How much of this is true and what can we do about it? And what part of this is not true and does not serve us? Reframing our thinking in this way can be very helpful.

The same goes for visualizing success. Closing your eyes and imagining yourself smiling, greeting your audience and speaking clearly and confidently can maximize the chances of achieving this in reality. “Top athletes do this all the time,” says Grace. “They visualize the desired outcome because they know it helps them get there.”

Practice is also vital. This does not just mean memorizing the words, but repeating the speech. Using a mirror, recording yourself, or doing a test run with a trusted friend will help you identify improvements you can make to the way you look and sound, advises Carmody. “Practice truly makes perfect.”

If your anxiety is extreme, she recommends starting small. “The next time you’re at a school assembly and you have something to say, say it,” she says. “Or if someone needs to say a few words at the rugby club dinner, volunteer. It’s about increasing your flying hours. All of these little opportunities to get up and speak will make you less afraid to speak in a work scenario. You can also get help from Toastmasters or professional presentation coaches.

Registered Psychologist Corina Grace

Wonder Woman pose

We can also use tactics moments before we need to speak to calm the feeling of rising panic. “Deep breathing relaxes us by lowering our heart rate, blood pressure and stress levels,” says Grace.

Moving our bodies can dissipate the build-up of adrenaline. “That’s why you often see experienced speakers walking up and down before going on stage,” says Carmody. “They manage their nerves.”

Ms. Grace suggests adopting a power pose in these moments. “Social psychologist Amy Cuddy has written about how we hold our bodies can impact our performance,” she says. “Simply standing like Wonder Woman, legs shoulder-width apart, chest out, and arms placed across the waist, can help us feel more confident and capable.” It is also wise to anticipate problems. For example, if your voice gets dry when you’re nervous, make sure you have water on hand.

“There are so many things we can all do to improve public speaking,” says Carmody. “I firmly believe that everyone can improve.”

A year after joining as a safety training instructor, Sonia has certainly done that. “I’m always nervous,” she says. “But I’m so much better than before.”

What helped her the most was preparation and practice. “I make sure I know my material inside and out,” she says. “That way, even if something goes wrong, I know what I’m supposed to say and I can continue. I also find out a little about the group I am addressing so that I can adjust my presentation, if necessary.

Being prepared also means arriving early. “It gives me time to check my equipment, get everything ready, reread my materials and calm my nerves,” she says.

Sonia also picked up other tips along the way. “My chest turns red when I’m nervous, so I now know how to wear a high-neck blouse to work,” she says. “I find that a walk the day before my presentation helps clear my mind.

“We all get nervous, but with practice we can learn to overcome that nervousness and maybe even start to enjoy public speaking. »